The Bully and the Mama Bear

Fletcher is going to something called KidsPlay at church for four weeks this summer on Mondays, Tuesdays and Thursdays. I guess it is kind of like Vacation Bible School and it gives him the opportunity to do something fun while I stay home with Luke for his morning nap.

All had been going well until one day when Fletcher told me he didn't have a good day. When I asked him to explain, he said that a little boy named Joe** hit him on the playground. I had to ask the obvious question -- "Did you do anything to him to make him hit you?" (I know my child is generally sweet, but not exactly an angel.)

Even as I was asking the question, I was really thinking that Joe's parents are probably unstable crackheads who let their four year old stay up late and watch Ultimate Fight Club lovely people.

Fletcher assured me that he had done nothing to him. The teacher put Joe in time out on the playground. Joe is not in Fletcher's class. I guess several classes are on the playground at one time.

I asked Fletcher's teacher about it since we are also going through that lying/pretending/making stuff up that didn't really happen/imagination phase. She said that Joe did hit Fletcher and confirmed that Fletcher didn't do anything to him. She also said that they were having some issues with Joe, but were "helping him work on his behavior." Translation: this little hellion is making all of us miserable and we will be glad when he is gone.

When I picked Fletcher up on Thursday, he told me that Joe had spit on him. The Mama Bear in me was ready to have my own Come to Jesus Meeting with little Joe.

This parenting thing is so hard and he is only 4! I don't want other kids to be mean to him. Fletcher is a pretty easy-going kid and most kids really like him and get along well with him. I want him to stand up for himself, but in a way that is not mean or pushy. I also don't want to be THAT parent that freaks out about everything because I know how kids can be. They need to learn to work it out themselves, but at what age do they have the skills to do that? At this age some kids have impulse control issues and behavior challenges. The reality is Joe's parents are doing the best they can just like we are.

Today on the way to KidsPlay, Fletcher said that he hoped Joe would not be mean to him today. I suggested that we pray for Joe to have a good day. So he did. I encouraged Fletcher to be a peacemaker and show kindness to Joe. And Fletcher said, "If that doesn't work, then I'll just run away from evil."

I said, "His name isn't Evil, it's Joe."

**The names have been changed to protect the not-so-innocent.